Today, I'm in the mood to complain. I'm saying fuck that to staying positive. If I can be optimistic most of the time, just to make myself feel better.. I should be able to have my time to give up and feel sorry for myself. I've spent most of my day, being miserable and stressed and disappointed in my past decisions, and my current situation.
I've been saying "it's not fair" and "I just want to drop out, imagine how care free I would be" along with "I wish I could just run away"
I realize these are all statements that lead to copping out, and giving up but at this very second, I want to. I've been stressing about the same things for three years now and I'm incredibly close to my breaking point. It never gets easier and I don't see it getting any better any time soon either.
It all also stems from the idea that, many people I know don't have to worry about the same things I do, and get to sail through carefree because they're simply just luckier than I am. The way I look at is, at random, this is the situation I have ended up in and those are the way better situations they have ended up in, and like mentioned before "it's not fair."
To be cliché for a second, these are the cards I have been dealt in life.. but these are some stupid fucking cards that are making me really upset.