Sunday, March 16, 2014
This chick is crazy awesome. That's not why I put this video here, but before I get into it's relevance I just want to point that out.
The reason I put this here, is people a lot of the time I'm super ballsy and I'm pretty impulsive and curious and will jump at the chance to do a lot of things that in the end maybe aren't good ideas but sometimes it works out. Anyway what I'm getting at is that although I have this side to me, and it's grown over the years because I used to have this crazy fear of being embarrassed, I've really grown to be like I don't give a fuck. But certain people come along to make me really nervous sometimes.
When I didn't know my ex yet, I would avoid him because I was so nervous to even be near him and be in the vicinity of possibly saying hi or having a conversation. Butterflies, go blanks, the whole thing would occur around him. That was several years ago, and no one has had that effect on me since. Truth bomb. As much as I've thought I really liked someone since that relationship it's honestly never happened since. (I just had a quick flash through all the people on that list and wow I can't believe myself. What was I thinking?)
It hasn't happened since until recently, where seeing this person makes me want to projectile rather than actually speak words to him. This is real. He goes to my school so any of the about five people I actually talk to will tell you this is real.
This video talks about being uncomfortable, and that't all the more reason to do it. It was a little slap in the face this morning. I won't get into, the whole situation that's going on with this person, I just know that I need to just go for it. Even if it makes me incredibly uncomfortable, the good kind but uncomfortable.
So here's hoping I don't puke.